Day 23 - A helping hand not wanted

Tonight, I went to Boston Market to grab some dinner.  As I was walking up to the store, I noticed a lady sitting alone with a shopping cart full of stuff.  When I went to order my quarter white with mashed potatoes and corn, my heart wanted to reach out to the lady who was obviously homeless.  I asked the Boston Market employee to give me another order of the same.

I sat inside for a little bit and watched her.  I wasn't sure if someone was coming to pick her up or if she was, in fact, homeless.

I was really nervous about what I was going to do.  I've given beggars on the corner some coin, but I've never actually went up to a homeless person to provide a meal and, maybe, pray with her on the spot.  I finally decided to approach the lady...

"Excuse me, miss?"

I had to call out to her twice because she had her head laying down on her arms.

"Excuse me, miss?  Are you hungry?  I have an extra meal that you can have..."

"No!"  She yelled.  She looked upset and shrugged her head to the side.

"Are you sure? I don't mind."  I was really trying to help her...

"NO!!"

She didn't want anything to do with me.  She was angry.  Not at me, but at the world.  I wanted to leave the food with her despite the rejection.  I could feel the nervous heat fuming through my sweater...  So I just left.

I looked back when I got in my car and she had put her head back down on her arms...

It's odd how it kind of hurt to be rejected when you just want to help someone. It broke my heart to see her alone like that.  I'm not quite sure I'll fully understand the anger some homeless people have towards people that try to help.  Perhaps they don't think they need the help?  Or they don't want another person's pity?  Or they were just burned so bad in life that they just don't want any part of it...

All I can do is pray for them...  I don't even want to touch the extra meal that's in my fridge.

Oh well, next time I suppose... Count your blessings.  If you're reading this, you've been blessed to even have the means to do so...

Do Widzenia.